12:27am It's been a long 4 months. Ups and downs...or maybe not 'ups,' but at least some somewhat normal happy times. And in some ways it actually seems as though those 4 months went by so quickly...that they weren't 'long.' One thing is for sure, it's been a long time since Josh & I have been able to have a night just to go on a 'date' and just hang out. It seems as though we have been extremely busy with the normal stresses of life, with the added mental and emotional roller coaster the past 4 months have brought. We had a good night. Our main goal was just to talk and enjoy each other without other distractions. Our big girls got to spend the evening with Josh's parents and brother, so I'm sure they had a wonderful time.
Josh and I talked about all kinds of things. It was so nice. We talked about so many things unrelated to Avelyn and also lots of things about Avelyn as well. Josh mentioned and I agreed that we wish we could go back a few months...back to when we were expecting the arrival of our 3rd daughter and about how we longed to see her again. Just to go back to room D 38 to see her again. It had been at least since Avelyn was born since we had been out together - just the two of us, so it was much needed and much appreciated. We are back home now and I am already looking forward to seeing our big girls in the morning. Already miss them. :) Aili has her first ever soccer game (on a team that Josh is coaching) tomorrow morning, so that will be fun.
Josh asked tonight if I ever felt guilty about 'moving on' since Avelyn has passed. I think some, yes, no doubt. But not fully. I know that is what Avelyn would want. This is what God wants too. To try to keep pressing on and to Let Our Light Shine. And I will never really, truly, completely 'move on' from Avelyn. She will always be at the forefront of my mind. Always remembering her. Thinking about her often. Always a part of me. She is our angel...sitting on my shoulder. :) I guess one if our daughters was with us tonight...and we enjoyed every minute of it. :) We are blessed and thankful God gave us this time together...
Josh and I talked about all kinds of things. It was so nice. We talked about so many things unrelated to Avelyn and also lots of things about Avelyn as well. Josh mentioned and I agreed that we wish we could go back a few months...back to when we were expecting the arrival of our 3rd daughter and about how we longed to see her again. Just to go back to room D 38 to see her again. It had been at least since Avelyn was born since we had been out together - just the two of us, so it was much needed and much appreciated. We are back home now and I am already looking forward to seeing our big girls in the morning. Already miss them. :) Aili has her first ever soccer game (on a team that Josh is coaching) tomorrow morning, so that will be fun.
Josh asked tonight if I ever felt guilty about 'moving on' since Avelyn has passed. I think some, yes, no doubt. But not fully. I know that is what Avelyn would want. This is what God wants too. To try to keep pressing on and to Let Our Light Shine. And I will never really, truly, completely 'move on' from Avelyn. She will always be at the forefront of my mind. Always remembering her. Thinking about her often. Always a part of me. She is our angel...sitting on my shoulder. :) I guess one if our daughters was with us tonight...and we enjoyed every minute of it. :) We are blessed and thankful God gave us this time together...
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